poor life decisions

Since school is back in full swing and I …

kj — Thu, 04 Sep 2008 05:42:25 +0000

Since school is back in full swing and I am busy busy trying to keep up with everything you should tune into my newest blog creation, “MBAing”, where my classmates and I post all of the greatest quotes we come across that relate to the MBA experience. It’s more fun than a 3 hour powerpoint lecture, guaranteed!

http://mbaing.wordpress.com/

Been a while since the last post, so I t …

kj — Fri, 25 Jul 2008 23:09:19 +0000

Been a while since the last post, so I thought I’d leave a quick one…

What’s wrong with this picture (circuitcity.com)?

Save $1.97 or up to $200!

Six hours in line for the new iPhone rea …

kj — Sat, 12 Jul 2008 19:38:58 +0000

Six hours in line for the new iPhone really demonstrates San Francisco at it’s best. Businessmen in expensive suits rocking out to Salt N Pepa’s “Push It”, practically screaming out the lyrics. A count every half an hour of how many people are in front of you. 168, 154, 148, etc (they were only able to handle about 40 transactions per hour – another messed up launch for Apple). Someone who sells boilers in Poland and is very opinionated about environmental controls. A very pleasant couple that loves dogs. Like, excessively loves dogs. Employees wandering around in a stupor (it felt really good not to be working this one). Hundreds of people brown bagging it. News crews. Police. Skeptics. Resellers. Exporters. “Let’s do the time warp again”. Free pizza. Shady deals. Street Teams.

When I finally got into the store (and the cheering subsided) it took less than 5 minutes to get the phone setup and working. The person helping me first told me “You really have the Apple look, you ever think about working at one of the stores?”. I just laughed.

Sorry Mom, I found a new love in San Fra …

kj — Sat, 12 Jul 2008 19:22:34 +0000

Sorry Mom, I found a new love in San Francisco and she refuses to go to Minnesota with me.

I’ve flirted with girls like her before, but never has there been such mystery and longing. She is into pretty much everything whenever. She has a passion for good food yet understands frugality. Only problem is that unless I pay I can only see her when I am with my friend Bret.

Her name is Costco, and you can meet her when you come to visit.

During my first ever trip to Costco there were some amazing things. Free samples of toilet paper were being given out. Walk up, get a square. I pity the person who has to empty the nearby trash can. There was a boy of about twelve years who was more than happy to carry his mom’s year supply of tampons around. I can only imagine the embarrassment when he found out what he was doing. Now if only I can eat a mountain of food before it goes bad….

This wonderful comment was given by some …

kj — Mon, 30 Jun 2008 18:34:19 +0000

This wonderful comment was given by some guy named Jesse, censored for the kids in the audience,

“loser f**k.

you stole that s**t from us you f**king loser f**k.

poor life decisions is right motherf**ker.

poor decisions to STEAL THAT S**T FROM US. poor life decisions is OUR F**KING PHRASE.

IF LUKE SEES YOUR F**KING FACE hes going to eat a hamburger. THEN KICK YOUR A**.

loser f**k.”

Questions I have in regards to this comment:
1. Who are you Jesse? I realize your website is jessedraxler.com and that you do average quality graphic design. But who are you really, deep down inside?
2. Who is Luke, and where does his passion for hamburgers come from?
3. Which of the people you know do you think I am? I would hate for the wrong person to get their ass kicked.
4. There are two sentences here that don’t involve the f-bomb. What gives? Lose interest? Lack of creativity? Using “s**t” or “a**” doesn’t make up for it.
5. Did you think that you and Jesse were the only ones that thought up the phrase “Poor Life Decisions”? Or maybe that you were the only ones that thought it up and knew how to register for it?

Internet flame wars have always amazed me. Seems like people are much more willing to verbally attack people on the internet than in real life. Wonder if it is an American thing to never move out of the consequences stage of motivation or if that is true world-wide.

I finally got around to checking the loc …

kj — Fri, 27 Jun 2008 23:52:06 +0000

I finally got around to checking the local high IQ organization calendar (yes, I am a member – good networking for future employment + guaranteed wins at pub trivia) and struggled to figure out details of each event because of all the acronyms:

“BYOB”, obvious, but still explained on the website for some reason.
“D/C – Dog/Cat will be at the event”, which I think means they’ve somehow created the ultimate house pet.
“MO – Members Only”, meaning jackets are required.
“FFO – Finger Food Only”, which I wish business school events identified, they always seem to have excess wine and a lack of substance. Which makes for quite the show.
“FE – Fictitious Event”, which make complete sense to list on a calendar.
“CO – Clothes Optional”…

As one, I will be the first to admit that smart people don’t always have the greatest social skills. I can only imagine a BYOB D/C FFO MO CO event. I would be carrying a six-pack of Newcastle and a bag of chicken wings, naked, walking up to the house. Door opens and a little yippie dog starts humping my leg. Once the moment passes I sit on the couch and for the next three hours everyone (who I know because they are members) awkwardly stares at the floor attempting not to make eye (or body) contact. I would leave mildly intoxicated with barbeque sauce in inconvenient places.

I think I will only be attending CO events if they are FE.

Moments of pure insanity have come to me …

kj — Thu, 26 Jun 2008 21:24:29 +0000

Moments of pure insanity have come to me between the times I am asleep and the times I am awake. Perhaps sleepwalking is not a myth:

Month ago: I wake up while frantically trying to plug a carbon monoxide detector into an outlet that is already full. I vaguely remember dreaming that I was unable to breathe and figured it must be carbon monoxide. Still wondering why my slumbering self thought it wise to test the air instead of just going to where it would be fresh.

A week ago: I wake up while frantically trying to take the pillowcase off of one of my pillows. The rest of the sheets from my bed are piled in the middle of the floor. No recollection of what was going through my mind. Curious if I would have been able to unbutton the duvet cover while semiconscious.

Last night: I wake up with a spatula frantically trying to flip two pieces of buttered toast placed together like a sandwich on the kitchen counter. From the looks of the butter smears on the counter I had been cooking (on the cold countertop) my “grilled cheese” sandwich for some time. Okay, I made that one up, but I did wake up in the middle of the night doing something crazy again, just don’t remember what.

Anyone a dream expert? An insanity expert? I wonder what all this means.

He says “I see…” I say “no” and ty …

kj — Fri, 20 Jun 2008 22:19:15 +0000

He says “I see…” I say “no” and type in my DSL phone number, he says “Now…” I say “high speed internet tech support”, he says “It so…” I say “yes”, she says “Pleas…” I type in my DSL phone number, she says “Main me…” I say “tech support”, she says “Okay…” I say “no”, she says “Have…” I say “yes”, she says “Please…” I say “connection problem”, she says “Are you…” I say “home”, she says “Are y…” I say “Mac”, she says “And fin…” I say “no” and type in my cell phone number. She says “Please wait while I connect your call”. That conversation took 3 minutes and 15 seconds.

Repeat that 5 times and add 4 hours of being on hold or talking to useless people and that was last night/this morning for me. Once I got a hold of someone who knew what they were doing (after talking with two “supervisors”) it took them 5 minutes to get my internet working again.

AT&T has the worst customer service of any company in history.

For the past week the weather here has b …

kj — Mon, 16 Jun 2008 21:14:41 +0000

For the past week the weather here has been consistently 10 to 20 degrees colder than Minneapolis.

Right now – San Francisco: 51, Minneapolis: 72.

I feel like I was lied to.

“Our global business communication is b …

kj — Mon, 16 Jun 2008 19:44:27 +0000

“Our global business communication is based on the highly efficient Internet with customers in over seven continents.” – buysmartcard.com

Iceland? Madagascar? The Moon?

My research has taken a turn for the worst.